Month: July 2022

Going through a divorce is stressful enough, and you’re sure to hear various stories from family and friends about their experiences of their California divorce process.

Many people will make assumptions based upon erroneous information that they have been told by other people or found on the internet while searching for information on getting a divorce In California.

Family law is complex, and regulations differ from state to state, so hiring a local divorce attorney is your best choice. The best way to ensure you don’t get sucked in or misled by some of the typical divorce myths is to hire an experienced divorce lawyer. 

The Myths And The Truth About Divorce In California

Divorce laws vary from state to state. Attorneys specializing in divorce and family court matters will be able to help explain the truth about divorce in California.

Myth #1. In California, cheating is grounds for a fault-based divorce. 

Truth: California is a no-fault divorce state.

Some states will allow spouses to file for divorce based upon fault. However, California is a no-fault divorce state and only allows divorce on two grounds on which spouses may file for divorce under Section 2310 of the California family code.

• Permanent legal incapacity of one spouse to make decisions
• Irreconcilable differences are the most common grounds for divorce in the state of California and indicate an era parable breakdown of the marriage

The only way your spouse committing adultery may be relevant to your divorce is if they used community finances to pay for trips or gifts. If this is the case, the money they spent could be deducted from their share during the equitable distribution of the divorce process.

Myth #2. The State Of California requires that divorcing spouses split assets 50-50.

Truth: California requires an equitable split; that does not necessarily mean equal.

California is a community property state; however, that does not mean that divorcing spouses will be required to divide their assets equally. What California law does require is equal distribution of any community properties; however, if there are assets that qualify as one spouse’s property, it is not subject to distribution.

All community property assets will be divided as “equitable,” not necessarily equally, which is determined due to the facts and circumstances of each situation. Money earned during the marriage is also considered community property. The judge could order a 50-50 split or an unequal distribution of community property depending on the marriage and divorce factors.

Myth #3. The wife will always get alimony and a California divorce

Truth: Alimony is not always part of the divorce process, and both partners will have an equal opportunity to request alimony.

California generally awards alimony in cases where there is a significant difference in the spouse’s current income and the earning capacity. Determining whether or not a spouse receives alimony depends upon which house has the most significant earning potential.

Factors to determine if an award of alimony is reasonable or necessary include:

• How long the two people were married
• What the financial needs are of each spouse
• The ability of each spouse to pay living expenses
• The education level and work experience of each spouse
• The age and health condition of each spouse

Myth #4. Primary custody always goes to the mother in a California divorce.

Truth: In a California divorce, both parents have an equal opportunity when determining the custody of children.

In California, child custody is determined based on what is in the children’s best interest, and California laws do not inherently favor either spouse unless one is deemed unfit.

Factors when determining child custody include:

• Relationship of the child with a parent
• Financial circumstances of each parent
• Living accommodations of each parent
• Occurrence of domestic violence
• Substance abuse by either party
• School and community

Myth #5. One arty can reject a divorce in California

Truth: A spouse cannot reject a divorce, deny or force you to remain married in the State of California.

That’s not to say that they can make it difficult for you to obtain a divorce. For instance, refusing to sign divorce papers or not responding when being served divorce papers are considered uncontested. The judge may grant a default divorce due to the non-action of the spouse.

Work With An Expert Attorney, Experienced In Family Law

At Azemika & Azemika, we devote our law practice to helping families navigate the challenges of divorce, child custody, child support, visitation, spousal support, and other family court issues and create customized solutions for each case.

We proudly serve the community of Bakersfield, California, and our partners have a combined total of over 56 years of experience in family law. We will help you ensure your parental rights are protected. Contact us today for a consultation.

When you marry someone, you imagine you will be with them for life. Unfortunately, happily ever after, till death do us part, is not always how the marriage ends. 

Divorce is never an easy choice, and most of us know someone, either a friend or family member, who has gone through a divorce. Often during the divorce process, you will need a divorce attorney to help you navigate the complex process of going through family court, childcare, child support and custody, and property division.

Usually, there is more than one reason why a couple decides to get a divorce, and there are multiple layers of overlapping experiences and issues. We have worked with many couples going through a divorce and will share with you some of the most common reasons why couples file for divorce.

Most Common Reasons For A Divorce

1. Lack Of Commitment

In a marriage, two people agree to commit themselves to each other. When one or both parties do not meet the commitment expectations, the marriage relationship begins to deteriorate. Sometimes, people do not discuss explicitly what commitment means to them and find out too late that their beliefs on commitment don’t align.

While a lack of commitment may seem vague or even hard to prove, there are always signs in a relationship when a lack of commitment is an issue. Many people contribute a lack of commitment to being a founding cause for other underlying problems.

2. Irreconcilable Differences

Irreconcilable differences are the grounds for most no-fault divorces. When asked why marriages ended in divorce, people often say they grew apart and are no longer compatible. People can be incompatible in several areas, including:

• Getting married when they’re too young increases the chances of developing apart
• A lack of shared values and beliefs
• Sexual difficulties and preferences 
• Religious differences
• Parenting methods

It’s not to say that two people with differences can’t work through them and stay married. However, in most successful marriages, the couple shares an overlapping set of values, beliefs, priorities, and interests. Incompatibility on some of the core parts of the foundation for a long-lasting marriage significantly increases a couple’s chance of filing for divorce.

3. Communication Issues

Communication is key to a healthy marriage. Suppose a couple has poor communication and cannot talk to each other, listen or argue too much, whether it’s over money, responsibilities, children, etc. In that case, it can significantly damage the marriage.

When you recognize that you and your spouse are often arguing and the fights are often repetitive and never really get resolved, that is a sign that the two of you need help to learn how to communicate more effectively. Couples therapy and conflict resolution workshops can benefit marriage under these circumstances.

4. Infidelity

Extramarital affairs are a contributing factor to why some couples divorce. However, an affair is often just the last straw. Many times some of those other issues, when left unresolved, can lead to emotional and physical infidelity, and while that is not an excuse, it can influence some people’s behavior.

5. Money

Financial incompatibility generally stems from differences in values and priorities around financial decisions. Fights over money happen when one spouse doesn’t agree with how the other spouse handles their money. Some of the signs that you and your spouse are financially incompatible are:

• Secrecy between partners and even outright lies regarding financial decisions or purchases such as making an investment, withdrawing money from savings, or even buying clothes regularly and lying about it
• You and your partner cannot talk calmly about financial decisions or have regular conversations about your finances
• If one or both of you make large purchases without consulting the other or take other actions that affect your joint finances
• You and your partner won’t or can’t set any joint financial goals such as building in retirement, saving to buy a house, or having kids
• When you and your partner do set financial goals together, one of you or both of you keeps subverting them

Generally, people in the lower income bracket are more likely to have financial incompatibility issues. With less money to go around and more stress about bills, it becomes more likely to fight over money issues. Of course, it can happen between any couple at any income level.

6. Drug And Alcohol-Related Abuse

If one of the spouses has a drinking or substance abuse problem, it can lead to divorce. Signs that your spouse may have a substance abuse issue include:

• Secretive Behavior
• Paranoia and other personality changes
• Mood swings and increased anger
• Changes and hygiene, appetite, and sleep
• Neglecting family and work responsibilities
• Secret and excessive money use
• Difficulty with memory or attention
• Hanging around new friends and abandoning old friends or activities

7. Domestic Abuse

Domestic abuse is a viable reason for divorce, and domestic abuse can include verbal, physical, or emotional abuse. Unfortunately, women are much more likely than men to be a victim of partner-related domestic abuse. Understanding the warning signs of domestic abuse and how to protect yourself when leaving an abusive partner is critical.

You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline and RAINN for help. Make sure your abuser cannot track your calls or search your history and location, especially if you share cell phones or phone plans or are on the same network as your computer, smartphone, or tablet.

8. Conflict Over Parenting And Family Responsibilities

Discussing parenting methods and essential family responsibilities, including household obligations, ahead of time can save you a lot of stress in your marriage. If you and your spouse have conflicting ideas about parenting methods and who is responsible for what around the house, it can eventually lead to resentment and divorce if there is no resolution.

Variations In Severity Of Reasons For Divorce

Every marriage is different, and most couples will face at least one of the issues on this list at some point during their marriage. Some issues such as domestic violence and severe substance abuse are more severe. Many of the other ones may be able to be worked through if both spouses are willing to put in the effort and time.

If You Need A Divorce Attorney, We Are Here To Help

Azemika & Azemika specializes in family law, divorce law, adoption, and child custody & support, and our attorneys are experts in California divorce laws. Hiring an experienced family law attorney is critical to ensure your rights and needs are covered if you are going through a divorce and have questions.

Contact us today for a consultation.